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DILF, 1/2

Title: DILF

Fandom: Teen Wolf

Pairing: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski

Summary: "Today is Scott's first day of kindergarten and Derek is terrified."

Length: 31,000 wordsish, 14,000ish this part

Warnings: LONG TERM PINING, domesticity, I'm the worst

Notes: So this like, super duper

moonklutz and

thehoyden's faults. They insisted on the sex, too. Love to

merelyn25 and

leupagus for cheerleading over the months it took me to write this. Also, cheers to

rageprufrock who merely asked, "Is Stiles preggo yet?" every time I mentioned working on this. To defuse your fears, Stiles is never pregnant at all during this fic. Strong apologies for the wildlife reserve bullshitting in this, park rangers, etc of the world, kill me not. A lot of this was written before s2 when we realized Derek was AWFUL at pack, although I argue he just needs practice.

We joked about naming this fic DILF for a while and then I decided it was the ONLY thing I could name it.

( Derek hadn't worried when he'd sent Jackson to kindergarten. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/9910.html

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I Wanna Take You To A-, 1/1

Title: I Wanna Take You To A-

Fandom: Teen Wolf

Pairing: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski ~~Boyd/Too Good For This Shit~~

Summary: "He doesn't like to think he's following orders, but he does slink away to the bar, where he thinks it's marginally quieter. At least it sounds like Ale-ale-jandro isn't right in his ear, anyway. Stiles sighs. He'd already texted Scott from the car and gotten back srry w allison bro derek gve me nite off. "

Length: 5100 wordsish

Warnings: gay bar jealousy, fucking.

Notes: I KNOW WHERE HAVE I BEEN (Answers: graduating grad school, hating my life, writing long fics that aren't done, etcettyra) But here, have this thing built entirely off of the fact that the cast has super said the bar they were filming at for s2 is a gay bar. Blame/credit/blame due to

moonklutz and

thehoyden, who are totally pack, brah.

( Stiles glances around. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/9654.html

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Won't You Lay Your Hands On Me, 1/1

Title: Won't You Lay Your Hands On Me

Fandom: Teen Wolf ~~okay~~

Pairing: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski

Summary: "He misses his regular appointment to get shorn because he's too busy trying to keep Scott out of trouble and he starts to look a little bit like a hedgehog. By the time he misses the rescheduled appointment though, his hair's grown out enough that he really can't be bothered."

Length: 3600 wordsish

Warnings: the usual- shenanigans, hair pulling, etc.

Notes: So, my tumblr addiction to Dylan O'Brien, aka the guy who plays Stiles, led to looking at pictures of Dylan O'Brien, like this one and then my usual cohorts,

moonklutz and

thehoyden, and I were like OH HEY. And then this happened. Also, I will be AWOL for the next week... since I need to write my thesis. So, don't expect to hear from me until next Thursday. And then I'll be drunk.

( Stiles had started cutting his hair short because Jackson had called him lady locks and elbowed him into the showers. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/9302.html

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You're Losing Sleep Tonight, 1/1

Title: You're Losing Sleep Tonight

Fandom: Teen Wolf ~~can't stop won't stop~~

Pairing: Derek Hale/alwaysagirl!Stiles Stilinski

Summary: "Stiles stares at him for a long moment, and he really can't puzzle her out. "Did you forget your own birthday?" she demands."

Length: 2900 wordsish

Warnings: this is pretty much just porn.

Notes: Because I deliver on my threats, here is the porn sequel to I Want Your Lips to Sing, aided and abetted by

moonklutz and

thehoyden. Basically, I will drag their names through the mud with mine as much as humanly possible. I am also posting a lot. I actually have another fic written. I'm thinking this activity is directly related to the fact that my thesis is due in two weeks.

( Stiles pokes him with her foot from the other end of the couch. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/9145.html

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Wilt Thou Exchange, 4/4

PART 3.

Length: 4,500 wordish this part, totaling out at 33,500, sweet baby christmas jesus.

Notes: ALSDFAH;DLFHASODFASDFA DONE. (ALSO I LOVE YOU

leupagus, YOU MADE ME CRY LAUGHING WITH YOUR BETA FOR THE SEX SCENE.)

( Jarvis guides him out, sounding a little plaintive. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/8916.html

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I Want Your Lips to Sing, 1/1

Title: I Want Your Lips to Sing

Fandom: Teen Wolf ~~just gotta live with myself at this point~~

Pairing: Derek Hale/alwaysagirl!Stiles Stilinski

Summary: "But for some reason, when Stiles sees Derek talking to Lydia, the two of them painfully good-looking, all she can think about is that her hair is in a messy ponytail and there's pizza sauce on the hem of her t-shirt. It's not like she wants to go on a montage out of a '90s teen film and come out like Rachel Leigh Cook on a staircase, but Stiles maybe thinks she doesn't want to look like the homeless one in the pack."

Length: 5000 wordsish

Warnings: duh hi haaaaave you met me, it's genderbending time.

Notes: Sooooooo,

moonklutz is an unstoppable bad idea machine. She basically tricked me into Teen Wolf with girl!Stiles anyway, so, this is probably v. apropos. This fic actually has a porn sequel already... which is probably

thehoyden's fault. So, yep.

( Stiles has never been one of the girls- she's always been one of the guys. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/8597.html

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Wilt Thou Exchange, 3/4

PART 2.

Length: 7,500 wordish this part

Notes: In an ongoing trend, I apparently can't edit unless it's 1 in the morning or something. WE'RE IN THE HOME STRETCH THOUGH, GUYS, BEAR WITH ME. (And kisses to

leupagus, always, who fixed this bitch up while recovering from pneumonia.)

( Steve starts by making a list. )

PART 4.

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/8267.html

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I Let The Beast In and Then, 1/1

Title: I Let The Beast In and Then

Fandom: Teen Wolf ~~NO ONE FUCKING LOOK AT ME~~

Pairing: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski

Summary: "Stiles rolls his eyes. "What could go wrong, Dad? You nixed everything fun.""

Length: 2500 wordsish

Warnings: slutty werewolf sex, you guys.

Notes: Basically it's like

moonklutz is a bad person and got me while I was super vulnerable, because

leupagus is still editing Wilt Thou Exchange and weak to any and all action and then accidentally I Teen Wolfed and

thehoyden is also super to blame. I'm sure

rageprufrock is laughing and hating me a lot right now.

( Sheriff Stilinski shifts the suitcase handle in his hand uneasily. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/7961.html

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Wilt Thou Exchange, 2/4

PART 1.

Length: 8,500 wordish this part

Notes: All the stuff I've said earlier is still applicable- I also hope that you guys appreciate that I'm going to work in the morning and stayed up JUST FOR YOU to finish editing this. JUST FOR YOU.

( Steve never came home from a date to find his parents waiting up for him- or really, any dates- which is probably why finding Clint and Natasha still up and staring directly at him is so incredibly unnerving. )

PART 3.

Entry tags:

Wilt Thou Exchange, 1/4

Title: Wilt Thou Exchange

Fandom: Avengers/Marvel

Pairing: always a girl!Tony Stark/Steve Rogers

Summary: "The first time Steve meets Toni is about a week after he wakes up."

Length: 13,300 wordish (OF 34,000 FUCK ME)

Warnings: YOU GUYS THE LONGEST FIC I'VE EVER WRITTEN IS ABOUT TONY STARK BEING A GIRL AND STEVE STILL FALLING IN LOVE WITH HIM

Notes: Ugh, this has been a labor- not usually of love, either. I don't even need to say that of course I did genderswap, because HI. But what does need to be said are a vast cornucopia of thanks- 34k worth: to

rageprufrock,

merelyn,

thehoyden,

amazonziti,

mklutz, and

aliassmith for TIRELESSLY encouraging me, from aiding and abetting research to 4 am gchat sessions. The biggest thanks of all is due to

leupagus for saving me from myself and foolishly agreeing to beta this. The following parts are all written, just being edited, so be patient with me. Title.

( When Steve is escorted back to headquarters, the first thing Colonel Fury does is introduce him to Agents Romanoff and Barton. )

<a href="http://twentysomething.dreamwidth.org/26571.html'>PART 2.</a>

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WIPVEMBER: The One Where I Tell You I'll Finish One Of The WIPs

Which... will probably be a lie until later in December since... I have a lot of crap to do.

Also, I will flat out tell you, I won't finish the SPN one.

BUT COME AT ME, BRO, VOTE AWAY IN THE COMMENTS

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/7924.html

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WIPVEMBER: The One Where Charles Has Babyfever

Fandom: X-Men: First Class

Pairing: Erik/Charles, Raven/Azazel

Length: 1000 wordsish.

Warnings: kidfic kidfic kidfic (ish?) Charles has a baby in this, anyway.

Notes: For my anon who asked for X-Men on the previous post.. and since I was too lazy to write anything new, here you go, sweet anon.

( Charles loves being an uncle more than anything else. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/7538.html

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WIPVEMBER: The One Where I'm Almost Out Of WIPs So

OKAY GUYS: After some ridiculous, terrible travel, I'm finally home for Thanksgiving, which I have a lot to be thankful for. To celebrate the day, but more importantly, the idea, leave me a comment with the pairing of your choice and I'll write something either Thanksgiving themed or thankfulness-themed.

Fandoms I'll Write For:
Bandom
Avengers/Marvel/X-Men
DC Comics
Parks and Rec
Glee
Supernatural
Hawaii 5-0
Bones
Inception
BBC Sherlock
White Collar

If there's something else you want, leave a comment anyway, and I'll see what I can do!

<3

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/7204.html

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WIPVEMBER: The One Where Brendon Is Spencer's Nanny

Fandom: Bandom

Pairing: intended Brendon/Spencer, past Spencer/Haley

Length: 850 wordsish.

Warnings: kidfic kidfic kidfic

Notes: Things I cannot resist: nanny aus. Things pretty much no one can resist: nanny aus. And now, I'm going to go back to using my xacto knife as a seam ripper.

( Spencer doesn't want to hire a nanny. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/6996.html

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WIPVEMBER: The One Where I Crossed Glee And White Collar Over

Fandom: White Collar/Glee

Pairing: Kurt/Blaine, Peter/El

Length: 600 wordsish.

Warnings: See the title of this post.

Notes: I DON'T EVEN KNOW, MAN. Just. Yeah. I just thought that El and Kurt would love each other. And then this happened. This was written earlyish this past summer when I suffered less from writer's block and when I was high on fashion.

( El prefers to stay out of Peter's work. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/6751.html

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WIPVEMBER: The One Where I Give You 2 Finished Fics Since I Was So Busy Reading THG I Forgot To Post

Fandom: Bandom

Pairing: Brendon/Spencer

Length: 1450 wordsish.

Warnings: There's a lot of drinking- one is a bartender!au, the other is a Prohibition!au. So.

Notes: Like, I am still trapped in a glass case of emotion, you guys. But now I am done with the books so I can get back to sobbing in peace. Time to play Adele's Someone Like You. But yeah, these are actually both done, just, obviously were short and possibly filled with tense issues and I always felt too "eh" about them to ever post them. TIL NOW WHEN I DECIDED NOT TO GIVE A CRAP.

( So, this is me, not giving a crap. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/6558.html

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WIPVEMBER: The One Where Panic Is Girls Except For Jon

Fandom: Bandom

Pairing: Brendon/Spencer, Jon/Ryan

Length: 950 wordsish.

Warnings: it's me so... it's genderbending.

Notes: I asked twitter and

fifteendozentimes said this one. SO THIS ~~BUD~~ FIC'S FOR YOU, BRO. Also, I know I've been pants (UTTER PANTS) at responding to comments, I'm sorry. But I am reading them, I've just been busy with work and school and well, reading The Hunger Games.

( This isn't the first time Jon has had makeup put on him. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/6308.html

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WIPVEMBER: The One Where Everything Is Super Fucking Happy In The Coffeeshop Verse

Fandom: Bandom

Pairing: Brendon/Spencer, Dallon/Breezy, Jon/Ryan, Pete/Patrick (also a bonus terrible secret pairing reference like a where's waldo of my shame)

Length: 1150 wordsish.

Warnings: sugar death

Notes: So,

pennyplainknits recorded LOVELY BEAUTIFUL PERFECT podfic for the Coffeeshop Verse, which you can and should find here. She also asked for some Pete in the coffeeshop verse in the last post so, see, sometimes I do deliver. This is for you, bro!

( Amelie is sort of their unofficial mascot. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/6103.html

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WIPVEMBER: The One Where Blaine Gets Slushied

Fandom: Glee

Pairing: Kurt/Blaine

Length: 700 wordsish.

Warnings: schmoopy boopy h/c

Notes: I put forward a call ~~for papers~~ for prompts on twitter this weekend when I realized I was a few wips short-

brimtoast asked for "Blaine gets slushied, has to face actual reality, melts down, h/c" and "His blithe confidence in S03E01 made me expect that plot line in canon and I was ready to LOVE it. But nothing ever happened." and then wrote her this which was woefully short and then we had feels all over each other, the end. (also, guys, feel free to leave prompts in the comments. I promise nothing, but YOU COULD GET SOMETHING)

( It doesn't register as cold at first- the first thing he can think is that it burns, actually, like that first breath out the door in winter- frozen wind in your face, like you can't breathe. )

Crossposts: http://twsomething.livejournal.com/5729.html

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WIPVEMBER: The One Where I Was Going To Write An Epic SPN Thing And Then Didn't

Fandom: Supernatural

Pairing: Dean/Cas

Length: 900 wordsish.

Warnings: this won't make any sense probably.

Notes: So, basically, this was written as a weird reincarnation au, and then season 6 happened and beat any love of supernatural I once had out of me, so. Womp Womp.

( It's hot and dry. )